Does Life have to be a Struggle ? [Video]

Most of us have been told all our lives that life is a struggle. You have to work hard for the money. Anything worth having, you have to fight for. Everything about life is always this up-hill climb. Well I’m here to challenge that belief. Life can be fun and you can live comfortably (successfully) doing the vocation you love! Indulging in the hobbies and interests that excite you. Success is not just the amount of money in your bank account. Success is more about doing what you want do do, having fun while doing it….and living life with fulfillment and depth (with increased self awareness and self improvement). Money is just a part of that equation.

How to attract the Perfect Mate

How to attract the perfect partner, or improve your current relationship (law of attraction method)

You are the most important person in a Relationship

by gerard fairley

In order to enjoy a passion filled relationship you must feel a measure of peace and tranquility ourself. How can you give love to somebody, if you can’t give yourself enough love? How much time do you spend on yourself in the relationship, or does your whole world revolve around your partner (and/or the kids, etc) ?
Take a moment right now and write down what you want out of your relationship.
1. Stable Companionship
2. Children
3. Good Sex and Affection
4. Financial help
5. Spiritual Connection
6. Mutual growth and expansion

You have to make your own list. If you are not sure what you want in a relationship…then how can you focus on it and pursue (attract)  it? The bottom line is in order to improve your current relationship, or attract a new one…you have to be what you are looking for. You have to be on that vibration. In order to do this, make a list of your strengths and weakness…and make a list of the strengths and personality traits that you seek in a person. Always be aware of your flaws, but focus on your strengths. Focus on the stuff you like about yourself and what you desire in a partner.

Check out my free 7 Day programThe Secret to a Happy Relationship

Great Talker
A deep thinker

Not too Romantic
Not a Good Listener
Hard to Communicate my Feelings

The easiest way to get anything you want in life is to desire it…feel the feeling of it …and then let it go. Once you hold on to the wanting of that thing…you keep it at arms length from you. You have to release the yearning and pining for it. That’s resistance. This same principal applies to love and relationships as well. Once you set your desire and intent out…forget about it and bask in your knowing that The Universe is handling it for you. Don’t notice the calendar. Don’t notice that your partner hasn’t appeared yet…just bask in your knowing and belief.


Your Self-Esteem
Your own self-confidence (self esteem) is something that makes us stronger and
guides us to success. How do you feel about yourself in the morning when you
wake up? When we lack confidence in ourselves, it spills over into our
relationships. Jealousy and other negative emotions raise their ugly head when our
self esteem is low. Self knowledge is the key to success for building up your self
esteem. Who are you? What do you like? What do you want? What makes you
Happy..and feeling good?

Decide on what things you can change and not change and let go. Accept
responsibility for your own happiness. If your partner is mad and upset, that does
not mean it has to affect you too, go to the mall or your favorite place and keep
yourself feeling good.
I have my list of strengths and flaws to review so I can improve me… I’m
competing with myself and nobody else. If you challenge yourself to do
something new and outside the box, it helps to bolster your confidence.
Don’t beat yourself up…you make a mistake.. so what ?! Don’t let you or your
partner badger you about this. Don’t let your mom or dad or anybody else try and
dump that guilt trip on you.

Be eager to give compliments and you will get them in return. But more
importantly give yourself compliments. Damn you look fine! Stand in the mirror if
you need to and look into your eyes. I also use the mirror exercise to bolster my
self- confidence.

Set new goals for yourself on a regular basis. Reward yourself when you meet that
goal! Make it a point to learn something new everyday. Challenge yourself, reach
for higher levels in all things you do. What ever interests you have, you should
learn something new about it everyday. Read an article online or watch a youtube

Speak only in positive terms and words. Cultivate optimism. Always think to
yourself…”what’s the best possible outcome if I do this” ? Expect the best, and
you will get more of it. This also goes with your partner too. If you expect them to
come home in a bad mood, or to be angry at so and so …they will. Always expect
the outcome that you would like to see.

Smile more! Some people just don’t know how to be happy. What makes you
smile ? Do more of that. Think more of that. Enjoy more of that (healthily). Only
hang out with people who make you feel good and have strong healthy
relationships too. If you are hanging out with your peeps, and all they do is
talk/complain about their bad relationships…change friends.

When you set goals, it boosts your self-image, and confidence. Goals will keep
you thinking positive so you can make changes in your life. Have goals for yourself and goals for your relationship. Goals are positive enforcers that encourage us all to keep striving toward a better tomorrow. Constant improvement. Write your goals down and let yourself daydream and imagine how good you will feel to achieve them. If your goal is to move into a bigger house by the following year…. Then dwell on that feeling. Put yourself on that “goal completion vibration”. Get out and look at some houses that you would love to live in. Go to a furniture store and pick out new furniture in your mind. Get into the feeling and vibration of your goal. Don’t worry about the details, of “how” and the “money”part. That will keep you farther from your goal….If you are setting your goal to complete your college degree, get into that feeling. How will it feel to have that
degree hanging on the wall in your living room? How good will it feel to get that better job (with that better money). Be sure you make sure everyday you are taking mental and physical steps towards your goal. Your feelings are powerful magnets that help you to attract what you want in life…use them !  If its your goal to attract a fulfilling relationship…then bask in that feeling. If its your goal to improve the relationship(s) you are already in, bask in that feeling.

What are your relationship Goals? Write them down some where and add pictures if you can. Goals are easier to get to if we have a strong emotional connection to them. Pictures, sounds, smells and images help us to forge that emotional connection to anything. Use this with your relationship goals. Consciously stoke up your emotion around this idea of attracting your perfect mate. You can do the same with your current relationship…focus on what you want and how you want to feel in your (self) relationship. Focus less on physical attributes and more on non-physical traits…this will ensure that your relationship will endure over time (when physical traits start to change).

Each of your goals must bring you positive rewards from your efforts to achieve
them. They must feel realistic and attainable to you. Be sure you have some kind
of way to measure your success at achieving your goals. When you achieve a goal,
reward yourself. By receiving positive rewards (pleasure), it builds strength of
character and self confidence. .When you do something rewarding for you, it keeps
you focused on positive things that drive you to succeed.

Don’t be scared to talk to yourself and get in your face. Demand better of yourself
(who else is going to?) You have to be your best coach and motivator. Using selftalk,
affirm that you are in control of your life. Let your mind know that you are
working toward a healthier self while building a more passionate relationship. By
building your inner strength, you improve your relationships and your overall life.
Reprogramming and reshaping the mind is the start toward more love, sex and
passion in our relationships.

Gerard Fairley

Can we have Peace without War ?

Can we have Peace without War ? Most of us hate war and other violence that we see all around us.

can we have peace without war

must war and peace co-exist ?

by gerard fairley

The fact that all things are existing at the same time (everything has a complement)…would make me think that peace and war are inseparable parts of one whole. The dominating and submitting is a force that we see in nature and all around us…and we cannot escape it. I think maybe we look at wars from only a very human perspective. Peace and War are merely opposite polarities of the same “thing”. We look at only the symptoms of war (violence,bloodshed, rape and pillage, etc) and we grieve for that. The fact is since the day there was “peace”…there was also “war”. War has only expanded, proportionately as our capability and overall evolution has expanded.

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But what is war really ? within our own bodies our white blood cells/t-cells are constantly fighting or at war with free radicals, invading bacteria and viruses. When we walk on the ground going thru our every day existence…our feet are killing innocent animals, creatures, insects, bacteria…whatever. They are at constant war with us…and we don’t even know it. The war amongst chemical elements is what creates stars and planets. The earth is at war within itself (volcanoes, tsunami, etc).

I believe when the One Human Race…separated into multiple races…. The Source had this hidden agenda if you will… Can the races get along amongst each other …. recognizing the oneness within each other ? We don’t really know how many mini-sub plots there are as they relate to our reason/existence here on earth.  But it is an interesting idea to ponder. We are human but we have to sometimes look at things from a non-human perspective to glean deeper meaning…this will help you deal with death, violence, ware, “natural disasters”, etc.

As above, so below. There is a duality in all things.


Gerard Fairley

How to Shift your Life in 3 Simple Steps

How to shift your Whole Life in 3 simple Steps – it all starts with relieving you internal pain and suffering.

how to shift your life in 3 steps

do you feel like your hands are tied in life?

by gerard fairley

The steps are simple, but I never said it would be easy ! Many of us are going thru the motions of life, just living..without a clear cut picture or feeling as to what we are doing and why. We go to school, start a business or career, raise a family and then wait to die. For the masses, life is just something to do…filled mostly with drudgery and fleeting happy moments here and there. We agonize over the pain and suffering that we experience, never seeing the growth and expansion that comes out of that pain. We get stuck in the pain of past traumas that we experienced, and this creates additional anxieties/fears that shape and mold major movements in our life (without us really being aware of it either). Many of us never get to shake the shackles free from our mind and ride the wave of life …filled with excitement and purpose. Well, I’m here to show you 3 simple but extraordinary things you can do to shift your whole life around in 90 days or less.

  • Clear away Childhood Trauma Residual Emotional Pain
  • Identify and clear away your major “Fear Buddies”
  • Re-Discover Yourself thru your Hobbies

Childhood trauma is a painful something that happened to you, or you visually witnessed…that has left a major mark on your personality, behavior and overall life path. A child that witnesses a traumatic event like the tragic death of a loved one, or watching mom get yelled at (or beaten) by dad for years, etc, etc. A child may be the “victim” of something traumatic such as physical abuse/assault, abandonment, or similar physical or emotionally catastrophic event(s).  Perhaps is was bullying or stalking. You may have been a person who struggles with weight and have heard enouhg “fat jokes’ in your lifetime. All this can cause a huge blow to your self esteem.  Many time this abuse can be very subtle that we fail to recognize it at all. The strong, “shadowy” influence of a childhood trauma, can leave you feeling painfully and emotionally vulnerable in certain situations that keep cropping up in your life.  Now the child grows into an adult, carrying this trauma around like a straight jacket…emotionally keeping him/her from excelling in certain areas…or propelling them to any number of self abusive activities. It shapes and molds how we pick our mates, our careers and everything else we do!.

Fear buddies are certain fear and anxieties that run in the background of our life, kinda like a piece of software on a computer. These fears have been with us so long, …we feel so comfortable with them, many times we are not aware of their strong influence over our actions and in-actions. Fear is supposed to steer us away from potentially harmful events or activity…but the fears that we inherit and learn during childhood, are usually based on learned behavior (and based on other peoples illogical fears). Many fears that we comfortably hold on to and accept “as a way of life”, is propagated by the media and society in general. So, 80% of the fears we hold onto are not serving us; but rather are restricting our forward motion mentally, spiritually and financially.

Once you neutralize your fear buddies and their energy (and their impact on your life), you will begin to rediscover who you are. Taking more time to enjoy life, especially your hobbies, can even propel you into a new business or career. When you are able to deal with the emotional pain of your childhood trauma (release it, and clear it out of your psyche), you get catapulted into your life’s purpose. Why? Because your greatest pains in life, will always yield your greatest treasures and pleasures in life…because energy has to remain balanced on both sides of your life equation.

We will have online classes in the near future.. on how to neutralize these events in your emotional mind/ you can smooth out the bumps in your life. It will help you be more successful with less effort. Because you will clear away the built up internal resistance you have …and can more clearly access your personal road of least resistance.  You will notice this in nature…all things animals, planets, the behavior of our planet, solar systems, etc…all function along the lines of least resistance and “just in time” management.


Gerard Fairley

Do you need Religion to Know God ?

Many of The Great World Religions are very similar if you analyze them….

how to get close to god without religion

can you know God, without religion ?

Many of The Great World Religions (which are actually very similar)…. cloak and hide spiritual truths in allegory and symbols. Being that religions were created (inspired) by mankind…and was (is) primarily used as a tool for control of the masses. Don’t forget from the days of  the Catholic Church and the holy crusades until current day…millions have been killed in the name of religion (Christianity and Muslims too….regardless of the reasons that we rationalize). Do you feel that the world’s great religions (Christianity/Judaism/Muslim/etc) help or hinder a persons”s spiritual quest to connect back with the One Source (God) …?

Does being part of a religion help you to know yourself and your connection to God (the Source, the Universe, etc) …or do we plug into it because we are taught as children that that is what we have to do? How much of our beliefs in life and about religion and God…are incorrect ‘truths’ that we dont think to even question, challenge or ponder ? Was the whole story about Jesus real or metaphor ? Why do all major religions have a hero that saves the people ? Why do we have to have an intermediary to get close to God / Why cant we know God directly if we were made in His image ? Why is God always portrayed as a male ?

As above,  so below…

I mean… I’m my daughters father…and I she doesn’t need to get someone else to talk to me. She can come to me directly… I intervene on her behalf directly too.  Is Jesus, Krishna, Buddha, etc ….. are they just a “middleman” that represent a material (or humanized aspect) of God that we can relate to ?

Gerard Fairley